It's fine if you want to back out now that you know it's me. Just give me a heads-up so I can throw myself into the nearest Rift. Which, if that's actually how you planned things out, is really convenient.
[...]
*Throw myself into the nearest Rift for law-related purposes, not for rejection-related purposes.
Because I'm a good person? It's not my goal to humiliate you.
And I guess because it would matter to me. I know people get married for lots of reasons and swinging is back in vogue, but I don't want people to think I'm frigid.
Oh right. And when you say I seem like I'd backstab for some golf claps, you're just telling it like it is out of the goodness of your heart. [...] For the record, I've always taken this seriously, and I've always meant everything that I said.
[...]
I already told you you wouldn't have anything to worry about on my end if that's what you're worried about. Hands-free, remember?
I'm sorry. I didn't really mean that. I just meant I wouldn't be surprised if you're questioning things now that you know the full story. I've never lied to you but I would understand if you had a hard time believing that.
[...]
Well, I do have questions about that. Maybe for another time. But that's not exactly what I meant. Can you at least pretend to like me in front of other people?
I believe you've never lied to me. It just [...] feels odd to look at you sometimes. Has anyone ever told you that?
Annie, I think for this to work I have to pretend to love you in front of other people. [...] The more realistically [...] normal we seem the less likely we'll be scrutinized for any reason. A friend from LA just started at Enodia too, and she already asked me why I left my old job. I have to make people believe I came here for you.
No, Crysta and I never talk about anything important. You probably know more about me than she does. It’s just a coincidence but I’m just saying it’s safer if nobody questions us for any reason.
[…] Just be yourself. More people at the Station know you than they know me.
That was good you brought me that drink yesterday, by the way. I’ll just have to say I was tired from driving. Or maybe our story will be I’m kind of an asshole you just put up with.
Lotta coincidences[…] Crysta? That’s Enoch’s sister, right? She seems cool. Should I make her one of my bridesmaids?
Was it good? I was trying to be a brat but I actually really love firecracker popsicles. And push pops. And strawberry shortcake ice cream bars. Write that down.
And I wouldn’t worry about it. I don’t think it would surprise anyone to find out I’d fallen head over heels for someone who ignores me in public. That is not an invitation for pity, by the way. It’s just a fact.
Yes. I have my limits. No one will believe I passed up the opportunity to wear a pretty dress and be the center of attention. I don't need bridesmaids though. That part was a joke. And we can say we said our vows in an intimate, private ceremony.
I guess I just want to be composed of the highest bug to human ratio possible. I'm like Spiders Georg for cochineal.
[...]
What's that supposed to mean?
Edited (Annie thinks her 'relationship' with Jeremy Hyslop (imagine Jack Harlow in the new White Men Can't Jump) was a well-kept secret ) Date: 2023-05-22 03:27 am (UTC)
I guess I’ll go method with this and go along with whatever you want to do. Just tell me where to stand.
Committing this to memory, too. Very eco-friendly of you to go for bug protein though, considering the emissions from the meat industry.
Idk, didn’t you have that thing with the guy with the messy chinstrap? I forget his name. But you always sat on the opposite side of the cafeteria from him and both you guys were in front of me. And sometimes you’d be looking at him like you were the Master and he was Margarita. And he’d be exploding his bag of chocolate milk. Was that something different?
Edited (Just spitballin here trying to add to the rich tapestry of Jeremy Hyslop) Date: 2023-05-22 03:46 am (UTC)
If you give me your measurements, I'll thrift you a suit and have it tailored.
Oh really? The meat industry is bad for the environment. What? Is it all the methane?
Okay, his name was Jeremy, for one. And for two, if we're being honest and accurate, I was the Margarita and he was the Master. (I did pick him up from police custody one time. He was only being detained, relax.) Three, those milk bags were hard to open. Most importantly, FOUR -- he had a deep voice and was good at basketball.
[…] I’ve never had my measurements taken. I have a large Express slim fit suit, I just pin the waist. Does that work?
And fine, right, okay, you’re the expert. I’m backing off.
You don’t have to justify Chinstrap Jeremy to me, no judgment here. Maybe a little. I didn’t know you liked basketball, though. […] If you’re a Rockets fan, we may have marital strife.
That’s not what I meant. And now I’m definitely not going to share my measurements with you.
I know. […] But I think you’re doing enough. […] It’s kind of why we’re going to go through with all this.
And fortunately for you my mood is very stable because the Lakers are the greatest team of all time and they never lose! (The Nuggets are acceptable. Jokić is like a large beautiful son to me.)
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 10:54 pm (UTC)dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:07 pm (UTC)dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:12 pm (UTC)[...]
I'm not going to apologize for being a dick yesterday until you apologize for giving me a multi-hour heart attack by withholding your identity.Sorry for being a dick yesterday.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:28 pm (UTC)Sorry that I shut down all of your mushroom suggestions.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:37 pm (UTC)It's fine if you want to back out now that you know it's me. Just give me a heads-up so I can throw myself into the nearest Rift. Which, if that's actually how you planned things out, is really convenient.
[...]
*Throw myself into the nearest Rift for law-related purposes, not for rejection-related purposes.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:54 pm (UTC)If anything, I'm more on board now that I know it's you. You give off the impression that you'd stab me in the back for some half-hearted applause.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-21 11:58 pm (UTC)dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:00 am (UTC)Anyway, to reiterate, it'd be purely contractual. It's just a property arrangement, we've talked about this before. You could do whatever you wanted.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:07 am (UTC)That really wouldn't bother you? Having people think your wife is stepping out on you?
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:09 am (UTC)I'd only need to know. It makes us look worse if it comes up and I seem surprised.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:19 am (UTC)And I guess because it would matter to me. I know people get married for lots of reasons and swinging is back in vogue, but I don't want people to think I'm frigid.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:24 am (UTC)[...]
I already told you you wouldn't have anything to worry about on my end if that's what you're worried about. Hands-free, remember?
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 12:57 am (UTC)[...]
Well, I do have questions about that. Maybe for another time. But that's not exactly what I meant. Can you at least pretend to like me in front of other people?
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 01:12 am (UTC)It just [...] feels odd to look at you sometimes. Has anyone ever told you that?Annie, I think for this to work I have to pretend to love you in front of other people. [...] The more realistically [...] normal we seem the less likely we'll be scrutinized for any reason. A friend from LA just started at Enodia too, and she already asked me why I left my old job. I have to make people believe I came here for you.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 01:21 am (UTC)You don’t find that odd?You did come here for me. […] I can make people believe, if you can.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 01:39 am (UTC)[…] Just be yourself. More people at the Station know you than they know me.
That was good you brought me that drink yesterday, by the way. I’ll just have to say I was tired from driving. Or maybe our story will be I’m kind of an asshole you just put up with.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 02:28 am (UTC)Lotta coincidences[…] Crysta? That’s Enoch’s sister, right? She seems cool. Should I make her one of my bridesmaids?Was it good? I was trying to be a brat but I actually really love firecracker popsicles. And push pops. And strawberry shortcake ice cream bars. Write that down.
And I wouldn’t worry about it. I don’t think it would surprise anyone to find out I’d fallen head over heels for someone who ignores me in public. That is not an invitation for pity, by the way. It’s just a fact.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 02:39 am (UTC)Committing this all to memory. […] Is this out of a general craving for Red 40 or something else?
And lol wow you really haven’t changed since high school.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 03:24 am (UTC)I guess I just want to be composed of the highest bug to human ratio possible. I'm like Spiders Georg for cochineal.
[...]
What's that supposed to mean?
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 03:46 am (UTC)Committing this to memory, too. Very eco-friendly of you to go for bug protein though, considering the emissions from the meat industry.
Idk, didn’t you have that thing with the guy with the messy chinstrap? I forget his name. But you always sat on the opposite side of the cafeteria from him and both you guys were in front of me. And sometimes you’d be looking at him like you were the Master and he was Margarita. And he’d be exploding his bag of chocolate milk. Was that something different?
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 04:01 am (UTC)Oh really? The meat industry is bad for the environment. What? Is it all the methane?
Okay, his name was Jeremy, for one. And for two, if we're being honest and accurate, I was the Margarita and he was the Master. (I did pick him up from police custody one time. He was only being detained, relax.) Three, those milk bags were hard to open. Most importantly, FOUR -- he had a deep voice and was good at basketball.
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 04:12 am (UTC)And fine, right, okay, you’re the expert. I’m backing off.
You don’t have to justify Chinstrap Jeremy to me, no judgment here.
Maybe a little.I didn’t know you liked basketball, though. […] If you’re a Rockets fan, we may have marital strife.dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 04:22 am (UTC)No, sorry. I'm just sensitive about 'doing enough,' you know?
Oh? Am I going to have to track your moods based on your favorite teams' win-loss records? (I'm a Nuggets fan.)
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 04:37 am (UTC)I know. […] But I think you’re doing enough. […] It’s kind of why we’re going to go through with all this.
And fortunately for you my mood is very stable because the Lakers are the greatest team of all time and they never lose! (The Nuggets are acceptable. Jokić is like a large beautiful son to me.)
dm [early morning 5/21]
Date: 2023-05-22 04:50 am (UTC)Not to be sappy, but I couldn't do it without you.
I hate* to break it to you... the Lakers lost to the Nuggets last night.
*And by hate I mean love.
dm [early morning 5/21]
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